Does Holidays bring you joy, stress, or both?
Life has a way of reminding us that every moment counts, especially during the holidays. For many, this season is synonymous with joy and connection, but it also comes with its fair share of stress. Family gatherings, a house full of people, deadlines that feel urgent but often aren’t—there’s an undercurrent of pressure that can make it hard to be fully present.
This year, the holidays carry an even deeper weight for me. My grandfather, who is 85, was diagnosed with stage 3B lung cancer in August. This Christmas could likely be his last, and everyone in our family knows it. It’s a reality that’s hard to shake, hovering like a cloud over what should be a festive time. And yet, this awareness brings a message that I can't ignore: the importance of savoring every moment, no matter how small.
Cancer teaches you to be present on a whole new level
Last week, we celebrated my sister’s birthday. I took my grandfather to dinner at her place, even though I could tell he wasn’t feeling well. He insisted on going. There was something in his determination that struck me—this unspoken understanding that every small gathering holds significance when you’re facing your mortality.
At dinner, I watched him as he laughed at my nephews’ shenanigans, engaged in small talk, and soaked in the warmth of our laughter. Somehow, even though he wasn’t at his best physically, he was entirely present in that moment. On the way home, he asked me to stop at the ER. He needed oxygen, and we stayed until he was stable and better.
The memory of that night stays with me. My grandfather didn’t want to miss the gathering, and he showed me how to truly live: fully engaged, soaking up every detail, and refusing to let the inevitable take away his joy for the here and now.
A Lesson for the Holidays
The holidays aren’t just about the big moments or the perfect plans. They’re about the quiet significance of being together, even in the midst of uncertainty. They’re about choosing to laugh at the chaos, to celebrate the people around you, and to show up fully—even when life feels heavy.
My grandfather’s example reminds me that the pressure we feel during the holidays—the endless to-do lists, the deadlines, the quest for perfection—can distract us from what really matters. It’s not the gifts, the food, or even the perfectly decorated tree. It’s the people around us. It’s the shared meals, the heartfelt conversations, the stolen moments of laughter.
Cherishing the past, embracing the present, letting go of the future
This Christmas, I’ll carry my memories of my grandfather’s presence at that birthday dinner. I’ll remember his quiet courage and his determination to show up for the people he loves. And I’ll try to do the same—not just for him, but for myself and everyone I care about.
As we move through this holiday season, I hope we can all slow down a little, let go of the stress, and focus on what truly matters. I invite you to cherish the memories we’ve made but also to create new ones — ones that remind us how precious life is, even in its imperfections.
The small moments are the big moments. They always have been despite being hard to sometimes notice it. My grandfather’s determination to show up, no matter what, is a lesson I’ll carry with me long after this season ends. Let’s take this lesson from him: be present, love fully, and never miss an opportunity to connect. After all, it’s those connections that make this time—and life itself—so meaningful.
